No-one told me this part

Before I fell pregnant, this is what I knew about pregnancy symptoms: You get hormonal, you get morning sickness and, um, well that is it really.

And then I got pregnant!

For the first few weeks I just fell nauseous ALL day long but I thought 'This sux but at least I am not vomiting'. Then in week 6 I vomited. It was horrible, I hate vomiting! I am one of those people who don’t just vomit out their mouths; I also vomit out my nose which results in me not being able to breathe as everything is clogged up with vomit. My eyes start to water and then with all the heaving and retching, a bottom burp or two inevitably fall out. It is a horrible and embarrassing sight and I had hoped to be one of those lucky women who didn’t get 'morning' sickness. Apparently I was not to be so lucky, not that day nor the 3 times the following day. Thankfully I did not get sick every day, but about 3 - 4 times a week I did, so I was left feeling nauseous all day long and vomiting. The only time I did not feel sick was when I was eating! But I expected this.

What I did not expect was that every morning when I brushed my teeth, my gums would bleed a bit. A bloody sink was rather alarming to me, Xavi and Yaincoa, but after a quick consultation in my pregnancy book it turned out to be 'normal'. As was the aching teeth every now and then. They would ache one day and be fine the next day. Again, 'normal'. The blocked nose? Yep, on the list of 'normal' symptoms right above 'loss of bladder control'. I swear I was waking up like 5 times a night to have a wee. How was this possible if baby was only the size of an apple seed or something ridiculous?? Then there was the tiredness. I don't think that I have ever felt so tired in my whole life. I was falling asleep on the sofa during the 21:00 news and could just about manage to get out the house during the day! It knocked me for six! If all of these (and more) are normal, how weird is this pregnancy thing?

Then came the hormones. Oh boy did they come in like an explosion. To be honest when I had heard women blaming "the hormones" before, I thought it was an excuse. Oh how life has a way of coming back and kicking you in the arse to show you how wrong you were. My hormones were a nightmare, not me, my hormones! I cried more in the first 3 months of my pregnancy that I had in probably my whole life. I cried at the TV, I cried reading about the development of the baby, I cried when Xavi and Yain were really sweet to me, I cried when I felt a little sad, I cried when I was lonely, I cried for no reason. I spent a lot of time crying in a heap on the bed. The flip side of the crying was the rage. Yes folks, RAGE. Xavi once told me that I had turned into a dragon that jumps in an instance. What once used to be little lovers spats in our house turned into raging wars. I hate confrontation and am pretty good at biting my tongue especially in public. However if you were to watch the video tapes form the IKEA car park, on more than one occasion you would see me shouting at my boyfriend, dropping my bags on the floor (breaking several newly purchased items inside) and the crying. People would cycle past me a little too close for my liking and I would get the strong urge to push them off their bicycles as they went past. Then I would get behind the wheel and the beast would be truly free. No-one was safe. Everyone got abused; I used words I hadn't used since my days picking grapes in the deep heart of southern Australia. Strong, loud and often. My mother would have been ashamed, the Australians that taught me all these colourful words would have been so very proud. Eventually one day Xavi pleaded with me to relax (in the car at least). That hit home as Xavi is normally the stressful one!

After 3 months the hormones have eased up as have the symptoms. But my days of lying in a heap on the bed crying for no good reason have not disappeared. Oh well, Xavi once said he wanted to see the softer side of me, well looks like his wish has been well and truly granted!!